Being a Roman emperor was one of the most dangerous jobs in history. 💀 Of the 69 emperors who ruled between Augustus and the fall of the Western Empire, only about a quarter died of natural causes. Most were murdered, assassinated, or died in battle. But some of them went out in ways that were just plain weird. 😳
Let's pour one out for the emperors who met their end in the most bizarre, unexpected, and sometimes hilarious ways. Here are a few of our favorites. 👇
Emperor Carus was a successful military commander who was campaigning against the Sasanian Empire in 283 CE. He and his army were camped near the Tigris River when a violent thunderstorm rolled in. ⛈️
According to the official story, Carus was resting in his tent when it was struck by lightning, killing him instantly. It was seen as a bad omen, a sign that the gods were displeased. The army, spooked by this divine intervention, immediately retreated. 🤷♂️
But was it really lightning? Some historians suspect foul play. The Praetorian Prefect, Aper, may have used the storm as cover to assassinate the emperor and seize power. We'll never know for sure, but dying by lightning strike is definitely one for the history books. It's got a certain... flair. ✨
The death of Emperor Claudius in 54 CE is a classic whodunit. The main suspect is his wife, Agrippina the Younger, who was desperate to get her son, Nero, on the throne. Most sources agree that she poisoned Claudius with a dish of mushrooms. 🍄
But here's where it gets weird. According to the historian Tacitus, the poison didn't kill Claudius right away. It just made him violently ill. So, Agrippina had a backup plan. She had a doctor, Xenophon, pretend to help Claudius vomit by tickling the back of his throat with a feather. But the feather, Tacitus tells us, was dipped in a fast-acting poison. ☠️
So, did Claudius die from poisoned mushrooms or a poisoned feather? Either way, it was a messy, dramatic, and very Roman end. And it worked. Nero became emperor, and we all know how that turned out. 😬
This one might be the most relatable. Emperor Valentinian I was known for his fiery temper. In 375 CE, he was meeting with a delegation from the Quadi, a Germanic tribe that had been causing trouble on the frontier. The Quadi envoys were trying to explain their side of the story, blaming the Romans for starting the conflict. Valentinian was not having it. 😤
He flew into a rage, shouting and screaming at the envoys. He got so worked up that he burst a blood vessel in his brain and had a fatal stroke. He literally died from being too angry. 🤯
Let this be a lesson to us all: take a deep breath, count to ten, and maybe don't yell at the Germanic tribes. It's bad for your health. 🙏
From lightning strikes to poisoned feathers to fatal temper tantrums, the Roman emperors certainly knew how to make an exit. It just goes to show that in ancient Rome, you could never be too careful. The next weird death could be just around the corner. 😉
1. History.co.uk - "5 strangest deaths of Roman emperors"
A great starting point for learning about the bizarre ways Roman emperors met their end.
https://www.history.co.uk/articles/strangest-deaths-of-roman-emperors
2. Wikipedia - "Carus"
A detailed account of the life and mysterious death of Emperor Carus.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carus
3. Tacitus, "The Annals"
The primary source for the death of Claudius, written by the Roman historian Tacitus.
http://penelope.uchicago.edu/Thayer/E/Roman/Texts/Tacitus/Annals/12F*.html#67
